A Kobold Called Norris

This week we have some fun with Feats:

Dear DM,

I was wondering if you have any ideas for the glorious feats of a Chuck Norrised Kobold named General Yipgrowl.  So far he has fought off 18 zombies single handedly, ripped the skulls out of two live orcs at the same time, invented advanced field artillery while throwing stones, and brokered a peace agreement with gnomes. This guy makes Gather information checks fun, but I am running out of Ideas and think it would be interesting to hear other peoples’ thoughts on crazy awesome feats.

Taken from Commissar Kinyaf on Deviant Art.

I am all too happy to help out with this!  One of my favorite past-times is inventing fun and exciting Feats (fun and exciting being the key terms here).  I don’t always think about game balance and the like, so fair warning there.  But when you’re talking about Chuck Norris, fair and balanced shouldn’t come into the equation anyway.

One of the keys to making interesting Feats is to avoid the typical +2 bonus to such and such Skills (like Athletic or Deft Hands), and think more about allowing a character to accomplish new tasks (like Die Hard).  Doing something new is way more fulfilling than getting a bonus.  The bonus might be awesome when we first get to add it to our character sheet, but we tend to forget about them over time.  However, doing something cool that your comrades-in-arms can’t do, is always satisfying.  So here are my ideas:

Prerequisite: +12 Base Attack Bonus
Benefit: Once per encounter if your attack misses you may roll your percentage dice.  The missed attack has a 60% chance of automatically succeeding.  If you roll 1% you score an automatic Critical Hit.

Death Bringer
Prerequisite: Devastating Critical
Benefit:  You may attempt a Coup De Grace strike on any prone opponent.  You must still roll your attack, but receive an additional +2 bonus to hit them.  If you hit, treat the strike as a normal Coup De Grace.  When attempting a Coup De Grace on helpless opponents you double your normal Critical damage and if they survive, their Fortitude save is equal to your Level+Damage dealt.

Fuck Shit Up
Prerequisite: Epic Prowess, Improved Unarmed Strike, Improved Critical
Benefit: Anytime you land a successful Unarmed Strike that deals 25 points of damage or more, your opponent must succeed at a Fortitude save equal to your Level or have their heart ripped out and be slain.  If they are not slain, you may still choose to rip off one of their arms and gain 1 Free Attack against them with their own arm (1d4 base damage).  The wound continues to bleed dealing 2d4 damage each round thereafter.

Power Word Norris
Prerequisite: Epic Reputation
Benefit: Once per day when making Charisma based skill checks against others, all targets must succeed at a Will save equal to your current Level.  If they fail, all of your Charisma based skill checks automatically succeed for the next Minute.

The Spirit of Norris
Prerequisite: Armor Skin, Damage Reduction
Benefit: Once per day, by channeling the all-mighty Spirit of Chuck Norris you gain DR 15/epic weapons and spell resistance equal to your Level for a number of rounds equal to one quarter your current level rounded down.

Taken from TISOTIT.

And that’s what I got for you.  Hopefully some of them are appealing and will provide additional fun and mayhem during your campaign.  If anyone else has other ideas or suggestions, please share!

As always, we need more questions!  And also, there will be no blog the week of the 9th, as I will be in New York having super happy fun times.

If you wish to submit a question to the Dungeon Master, please e-mail them to dungeonmastermind@gmail.com, or you can Tweet me a question @AskthedDM. And make sure to review the disclaimer.

You can also see me in action in the webcomic, One Die Short.

This entry was posted in DM Advice, Dungeons & Dragons, General Roleplaying, Player Advice and tagged , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to A Kobold Called Norris

  1. Lisa says:

    This is the ideal answer. Eveonrye should read this

  2. Dave, Player, DM, man about town says:

    ah I believe if my adventures ever reach epic level my super epic npc kobold will eventually achieve godhood(if he isn’t killed first). while he is an npc I am playing him as if he were a character. so these should help considerably. I created my own feat called Yip Growlian Combat for my adventuring PCs, not an easy feat to get, It gives you a 5% chance to instantly kill your enemies in an insanely awsome way of your choice. I haven’t revealed it yet though.

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