Greetings Nerdlings! I’ve been silent for a while, and there’s a good reason for it. I’ve been busy working on something new!
The time has finally come – after nearly 20 years of Dungeon Mastering and game design, I have decided to release my Roleplaying System to the world! All of you know that I’ve got a lot of opinions about the “best way” to roleplay and Dungeon Master. I’ve complained plenty about rules from other systems (and entire editions of D&D in general). And now I’ve done something about it. Put my foot where my mouth is, or something. And now, born of all my whining and complaining, is the “Legendary Roleplaying” System!
“Legendary Roleplaying” utilizes a familiar d20 mechanic, but offers a much more streamlined, deadly, and fast-paced Combat style, as well as an extremely flexible (and class-less) Character Creation and Advancement ruleset. It focuses on ROLE-playing, because let’s face it – we all know I like playing pretend more than anything else.
It has 3 unique mechanics of my own devising, which support a rules-based focus on roleplaying, storytelling, and collaboration between Players and DM. The first is the Fate Die, which is a single die that accompanies every roll a Player and DM make, and helps sew unexpected chaos into the game. It could be good, it could be bad, but it’s always good fun!
The second is Motivation, which functions much like Alignment, except way better. It uses personal drives, goals and desires instead of dualistic morality to represent a Character’s personality. And it allows for real in-game consequences and rewards for good (or bad) roleplaying. The most significant of these effects allows Players to essentially take on the role of the DM for a brief moment.
Finally, the last of these mechanics is Morale, which tracks the general well-being of the Player Characters and impacts both the Fate Die and effects from Motivation.
The main goal with this system was to create a game that me and my Players enjoyed playing, and I accomplished that. It might not be for everyone, and it certainly doesn’t do everything well, but it’s the game we wanted, and its the only game we play now. If you enjoy collaboration, improvisation and roleplaying, but want enough rules to make Combat interesting, and still feel like you’re gaming, “Legendary Roleplaying” is just what you need!
Thanks for all of the years of support, and I hope you enjoy your adventures in my game!
Greetings Nerdlings! As always we want questions, so submit yours to onedieshort@gmail.com. This week we’ve got another question from a struggling DM. I’ve trimmed it down and edited it to what I view as the most essential problems we need to address. Jake asks:
I’ve been DMing a pre-written campaign module. The first book went just fine and the second book was much harder. I ended the campaign because it was making me extremely burned out. Two players (Wizard and Rogue) raised the following issues:
The Wizard said that they feel useless because there are frost immune creatures in the campaign, and their spell list is centered around frost spells. They said it’s my duty as a DM to provide tools so that the module feels meaningful and they have options to contribute in other ways.
The Rogue said they feel the monsters are too tough for their character. They said I should rearrange the encounters so that they never fight large mobs.
I want to just play by the book because I don’t want to reinvent the campaign. I don’t have much time, I wanted to make it a simple game among friends. We kept reasoning back and forth, but I got more and more strong language and negativity.
I decided to end the campaign for now since I couldn’t reason with them. The arguments were making me very tired and I lost all fun in gaming. In short, am I at fault for not rearranging the campaign for those two players?
Unfortunately for Jake, there isn’t a binary answer to this question. The heart of the issue revolves around responsibility: Player responsibility vs. DM responsibility. Before we can tackle the question in greater detail we first need to define what those major responsibilities are. Let’s start with:
Player Responsibilities
If we place Players on a spectrum of ideal play styles, we end up with two opposing Player-types: the Entitled Turd Muffins and the Team Players. The Entitled Player thinks their only responsibility is to show up and roleplay. They’re there for a good time and it’s the DM’s job to make it happen. The game should go the way they want it to go, and if it deviates from their desires and expectations, they get bent out of shape and whine about how hard life is, and how shitty the DM is. That’s a real turd muffin.
A solid Team Player knows that they’re a cog in the system, and need to perform their functions, as well as operate smoothly with the other parts of the machine. They know their role, and they know that they are a useless piece of detritus without the rest of the team. When discussing Player responsibility, we need only look to the Team Player to know how to do it right. The most essential duties are as follows:
Show up (and give as much notice as possible if you can’t)
Be flexible (but speak up when you feel unheard or underutilized)
Communicate often (but don’t just complain)
Let’s dive a little deeper into each of these.
1. Showing up is Hard to Do
It should come as no surprise to anyone that being present for a game is the most important thing, but we all know how difficult scheduling can be. Life gets in the way – whether you’re in high school or married with children. It’s something of a truism in the roleplaying community that scheduling can be the biggest stumbling block to playing the game.
Jake seems to have conquered this situation with most of his Players, and to me, that says something important: The people that keep showing up WANT to be there. Nobody keeps coming to a game they have given up on. The simple act of being there means they want to make it work. Once a DM knows who wants to play the game, they can start making the best game they can for those dedicated Players.
2. Be a Reed in the Wind
Contrary to what Jesus would have you believe (see Matthew 11:7 if you care), there’s nothing wrong with being shaken by the wind. Let other people’s doctrines sway you if they resonate with you. As soon as you dig your heels in, you’re done being a Team Player, unless your team believes the same dogmatic nonsense as you. But in my experience, everyone is seeking something a little different (in roleplaying AND life). For some Player’s it’s fully embodying their Character, for others it’s optimizing their Character into a monster-slaying machine, and for others it’s the socialization and camaraderie that only a roleplaying game can create.
Regardless of what you want as a Player, you need to bend and sway with your fellow gamers and respect their desires as much as your own. But even the most flexible of Players can forget that the GM should be afforded this same level of flexibility. The DM might have desires that differ slightly from yours, or even greatly. But the DM should be considered a part of the team as much as every Player.
3. Say it Like You Mean it
The final piece of the puzzle is communication (which is probably the hardest part). Whether you’re an opinionated turd that doesn’t understand the concept of constructive criticism, or a people-pleasing reed getting thrashed by a hurricane, you’re still doing a terrible job.
Every Player and DM should be openly and honestly communicating what doesn’t work and what works well. But the more important of two (in my opinion) is Positive Feedback! Positivity can go a long way. Generally speaking, if you tell someone to continue doing the good things that they’re already doing, they will do them more and better. Whereas, if you tell someone everything you hate about what they’re doing, they will either resent you for it, or dig their heels in to assert their dominance.
That’s not to say that constructive criticism doesn’t have its place. We need to let people know when they’re doing an all-around shitty job with something. But saying, “You’re doing a shitty job,” isn’t the ideal method of transmission. Instead, try something like, “I really appreciate how dedicated your are to roleplay, and also, you tend to speak over other Players when you get excited, and it can make them feel less important.”
This brings as to the final piece of our puzzle:
Dungeon Master Responsibilities
If you’ve been paying close attention at this point, it should come as no surprise that the Dungeon Master is just as much a part of the team the Players, and therefore, their responsibilities are exactly the same. Which brings us to our ultimate conclusion and the answer to Jake’s question.
Are you at fault? Should you rearrange the campaign to suit your Player’s needs? Well… that all depends. You’re absolutely right that changing a pre-written module requires work, and if you didn’t plan for that work, then you’re not going to want to do it. AND… what expectations were set from start? Any? None? What did everyone think they were getting into?
As I said from the start, the fact that you still had Players arguing with you, means you have Players that want to play the game, so showing up isn’t problem. But it’s also okay that each Player wants to feel useful. No one enjoys the experience of playing a Character that seems out of place or pointless. The WHOLE point of roleplaying is feeling like your Character accomplished something. For some it’s Character growth and development, and for other’s it’s more concrete things like killing the monster and solving the puzzle.
Making sure that each Player feels a sense of accomplishment, at least some of the time, is 100% the responsibility of the DM. As the storyteller, WE are the ones that give each Player their moment to shine. We are NOT aloof Gods toying with ignorant cattle. We are benevolent Gods giving our loyal subjects what every person wants: to feel fucking rad!
So, what can you do to salvage this situation? Possibly nothing at all. It might simply be too far gone. But could you have done something different from the start to keep you out of this whole mess? Probably. You could have thoroughly read through the Campaign, sat down with your Players, and helped them to develop Characters that you knew would allow them to shine in a way they want to shine. That also requires THEM to know what they want, and communicate it clearly to you. And it requires you, as a DM, to understand how each Character is going to interact with the Campaign setting.
It’s a lot of work to be sure, but no good roleplaying session can be tossed out, slap-dash on a whim. Anything worthwhile requires, at the very least, a bit of finesse and improvisation. The only way it can work otherwise is if everyone’s expectations are set clearly beforehand. If the whole team agrees to just play the game “as-is” without concern for individual wants and desires: great! Is that likely to happen? Probably not. Is DMing for everyone? Definitely not. But…
DMing is among the most noble of professions. A good DM should be regaled with tribute and praise by all who behold their majesty. And a great DM knows they don’t need it.
Hello loyal readers! It’s been a few months since my last post, and that’s mostly due to a lack of questions, so if you’re reading this: send a question to onedieshort@gmail.com! Remember: as an authority on Life, the Universe and Roleplaying, I’m in no way restricted to answering Roleplaying questions alone. So, send me any queries you might have about Geekdom, Nerdery, Roleplaying, or general life advice. I have opinions on everything. And you need them.
This week we’ve got a fairly complex question about the nature of good DMing. It comes to us from Grace:
Hi! I am a very new dm, but I feel like I’m always missing something when I dm, and my adventures feel bland, structured, or random. I feel like part of this is that the players are having trouble being creative or contributing to make the plot line compelling or funny. I’m not blaming them in any way, I’m just trying to figure out why the adventures and campaigns I do feel so bland and boring. I love playing and I’m always very invested and enjoy the other campaigns. I worry I am leaving out key components, or maybe just minor ones that make an adventure fun. Please let me know. Thank you!!!!
-Grace
Honestly, it’s hard to even know where to start with this one. I could post a bunch of links to my treasure trove of previous blogs about how to be a good DM (which I will later), but there’s something about the sincerity and desperation of your question that really has me wondering:
What the Hell makes a good DM anyway?
Once upon a time, in the Waybackwhen times, I was convinced that nothing trumped story. Story was everything. But as I pondered your question, I realized that we’re still playing a game. When that game gets lost, we might as well be reading a Choose Your Own Adventure book. (Side note: anyone born after the 90’s might not even know what these books are, but they were what made me realize I needed roleplaying games in my life).
A Roleplaying Game has to be both a game and a theatrical experience, not one or the other. Much of the criticism of 4e D&D revolved around its bias toward game mechanics and battle maps, and the uncertainty over whether or not it was trying to be a crappy war game, or a crappy roleplaying game. For the sake of argument, we’ll assume that your players all want to be playing a Roleplaying Game, and therefore appreciate both sides of the coin.
So, if everyone wants to be playing the game they’re playing, why isn’t everyone having a good time?
There must be balance in the Force!
Once we acknowledge the two paramount factors (the Roleplay and the Mechanics), we need to ask ourselves as a DM: Which is most important to me, and which is most important to my players? My assumption from the question would be that you are seeking a better Roleplaying experience. The desire for deeper player investment and a humorous good time for all, means you want what most good DMs want: to tell a great story. I’ll get to how we can do this in a bit, but the biggest question you need to answer is part 2: Which is most important to my players?
I know players can be annoying, and often get in the way of proper storytelling, but without them we are nothing but failed novelists. A few key questions every good DM should know the answer to are:
When are my players having fun?
Am I having fun when they’re having fun?
Where are my dice?
The most important thing every new DM should do is talk to their players and observe their players. I would argue that observation is even more important than talking, because players are like children (as I’ve noted on many occasions). They think they know what’s good for them, but when you force them into the unknown and the uncomfortable, they’ll often have more fun than they expected. Take careful note of the times your players seem most joyful, most attentive and most excitedto be theircharacters. This will guide you more than any player questionnaire or discussion.
Something that inevitably arises in player groups is disparate desires and goals. Not everyone wants the same game, but the hope is that the majority of the group can mostly agree on what a fun session is. There will often be at least one outlier, and we can try our best to keep them happy some of the time, but majority rules in roleplaying. If most of the people are happy, that’s close enough, because there’s always another group to join for the problem child. (And if you’re a player that can’t ever seem to find the right group, you should reconsider your personality).
Okay, so let’s assume we know what the players want, we know what we like as a DM, and everyone is mostly on the same page. Then:
Why isn’t everyone having Fun?
There’s a bit of a tell in your question for me, and it’s this bit: my adventures feel bland, structured, or random.
Each of these issues can stem from separate causes, but they can also share a single root cause: DM uncertainty. If you don’t know what your goal is with a campaign or an adventure, your players will have a hard time figuring one out for you. I’m a huge proponent of improvisational skills in a DM, but these come with time, and need to be built out of structure and planning.
In order to create a compelling story, we need to commit to ourselves. Developing confidence as a new DM is one of the hardest things to do, but also one of the most important. You need to know what you do well in order to really step into the role. Is it humor? Is it suspense? Mystery? Action? Intrigue? Figure out what you love and know, and focus on those elements. You need a little bit of everything to make a truly compelling story, but doing them all wellis not essential.
Think of your DMing like a book or film – genres exist for a reason. Most stories include many of the same elements, but each genre has its own focus. Don’t get mired in the trap of epic fantasy storytelling if that’s not your thing! Branch out, explore and trust your gut. Nothing makes for a bad story quite like forced, trite, storytelling.
The last point I want to make here is this: being a DM is hard. It requires a lot of hard work and dedication to do it well, and it isn’t for most people. There’s a reason a lot of DMs end up being “Forever DMs” (aside from our massive egos and obvious control issues) – not many people want to take on the work. If it’s not for you, that’s fine. Half-assing an adventure can be a worse experience than not playing at all. But if being a DM is what you want to do, then put as much spare time and effort into it as you can. Your players will be thankful. And if they’re not, they’re probably not worth your time.
I hope this somewhat vague post was helpful, and if you have more questions in the future once you tease out what your specific issues might be, I’d be happy to tackle those as well. But if this was entirely useless for you, here’s some links to my previous blogs about essential DM skills:
Whether or not anyone’s noticed, I’ve been on a hiatus for a while. Like, 9 years “a while”. But over those years I continued to receive questions, especially with the recent resurgence of D&D. I ignore them because they’re all lame technical questions about rules, abilities, spells and the like. And if you’ve read my blog before, you know I don’t care about any of that.
Roleplaying is about roleplaying, otherwise they’d call it boring, and then your grandmother would be playing it instead of canasta. (I don’t know what canasta is, or if it’s an old people game, but it sounds old and boring.)
Fortunately, I finally received a question that I couldn’t pass up. It’s about roleplaying, rules, and their intersection. It comes to us from Cameron (and it’s been edited for clarity):
I played a session with some friends and they kept making stupid, rash decisions without thinking. I know I can straight out attack other party members, but I have high persuasion and charisma. Can I use these skills against the party to get the campaign to go in a different direction? I know D&D is mostly roleplaying and I can’t force people to do something different, but I thought it might be a good way to settle arguments within the party.
The short answer is, yes. If we have skills and abilities represented by dice, we should be able to use those abilities against anything in the Game, including other PCs. The problem lies in the outcome. How another PC reacts or responds is a complex problem, and requires a deep dive into both roleplaying and mechanics.
The first point I’d like to address is the “stupid, rash decisions” part. If you happen know a group of Players that doesn’t make stupid rash decisions from time to time, then get some help, because you’re either delusional or a liar.
The great part about roleplaying is the unknown. Everyone at the table is there to unravel, learn, and explore. (And usually kill.) But the unknown is what captivates. And when only the DM knows the secrets, everyone else is working out of ignorance. That means the Players can only make their best guesses at what the right path is. And more often than not, at least one person is going to guess differently than everyone else. And sometimes no one will be on the same page at all.
How then, do we decide what exactly a stupid or rash decision is in the moment? Perspective is everything, and therein lies the greatest obstacle to Party cohesion. Unless the DM is dropping some serious hints, it can be difficult (but also good fun) to try and puzzle through the right answer. Everyone thinks they have the right answer, and arguing with each other can also be good fun as long as it doesn’t last for an hour. But there’s another problem to address apart from individual perspective, and it’s this: Who’s doing the arguing? The Player or their PC?
This can be difficult to tease out, even for the Player doing the arguing. Sometimes we get lost in our Character, and sometimes our Character gets lost in us. And if one of those people is being dumb, we need to know:
Is my PC stupid or am I?
This is an age-old question dating back to the dawn of roleplaying. Does Dave always make characters with low Intelligence because he’s a big dummy that hides it behind impeccable roleplaying? Or is Dave such an insightful genius that only he could play a dummy with such panache and subtlety?
We may never solve this conundrum without tricking Dave into taking an IQ test, but the point here is that it can be tough to see the difference between when someone is roleplaying and when someone is a pain in the ass.
Good roleplaying should generally be respected and rewarded, even when it annoys everyone at the table, because if everyone else is roleplaying well, then it’s really their Characters that are annoyed, and fake emotions shouldn’t be confused with real emotions. If you’re the kind of person that gets so invested in your Character that you get butt-hurt and angry in real life when you’re angry in fake life, you should just go back to playing text-based RPGs by yourself.
The main point I’m making here is this: everyone should be roleplaying to the best of their ability, and if this is happening, then we need to ask our next big question:
What’s the point of all these dice?
There’s a reason we have dice and rules and character sheets: because we decided sometime around the age of 12 that playing pretend was for babies and we needed structure and rules to continue playing pretend like grown-ass adults.
Without the dice, we have to agree with one another on some vague set of rules, but we all learned as children that this rarely works. It devolves into some version of, “You can’t penetrate my titanium armor with you sword!” or “My fireball is stronger than your castle!”
The dice are an impartial intermediary between us and our desires. The dice are law. The dice, not the Dungeon Master, are our only God.
But there is another, sometimes written, sometimes unwritten rule in roleplaying: the Player’s are always in control of their Character’s actions (unless of course Magic and the like get involved). The DM can’t persuade a PC to do something, because without that agency, we would all feel railroaded down a pre-fabricated path. We are drawn to roleplaying, not just for the mystery and excitement, but also for the control. If that control is taken from us, we might as well just go back to work behind the cash register or cubicle, and let our power-tripping manager continue to crush our souls.
However, just as one PC can choose to attack another PC, they can always attempt to persuade one as well. But there’s an important difference between a physical assault and mental one: a successful persuasion roll should not dictate the losing PC’s actions. What it should do is make one PC realize how damn persuasive their friend is. What happens next is, and should be, left up to roleplaying. There are many questions each PC needs to answer before making a real decision: How much do I respect this other PC? How much do I care about keeping the peace? How invested am I really in this action?
Each of these questions will influence how a PC should react to a well thought out and articulate argument. But even the greatest argument can’t sway someone that’s committed to their path. This is something we all experience everyday on the internet. We formulate the most logical, emotionally appealing, and concise argument on some message board, only to find that the big dummy we’re talking to still doesn’t believe us.
The power of persuasion is not nearly as powerful as the roll of a die might have us believe. So, sure, every DM should let their Player’s roll anything and everything against each other, but we should all remember the limitations of the the human mind, and forgive our fellow Players for being short-sighted fools.
Besides, no Dungeon Master worth their salt would allow a party to degenerate into constant in-fighting. And if you find yourself in that position, you should ask yourself this: Am I the only one annoyed right now? And if the answer is yes, then maybe you’re the annoying one.
The Dungeon Master is back with another awesome gaming question! Our illustrious reader asks:
How do you feel about pregnant characters? How do you handle it and what does it change in-game?
This question comes at an appropriately awesome time, because my wife currently has a baby on the way! Hoorays!
Just like real people, imaginary people can have babies too. Not only that, but they should have babies. Your world should not be populated entirely by adults. In fact, in a world without contraception, there will probably be a lot of children and pregnant women.
But there’s a big difference between a pregnant NPC and a pregnant PC.
As with all event and plot points in a good Roleplaying game, the DM should first ask themselves: “What does this do for the game?”
Does it propel the story forward, add an interesting complication that supports the direction of the story, or is it just annoying for most of the Players? It’s also important to consider the source of the idea: was it the DM or the Player?
If it was the DM’s idea, s/he better as hell have a good reason for it, and not just want to throw a giant wrench at the Players. If you want one of the characters to birth some demon spawn for the sake of the game, that’s good, but if you want a character to get pregnant because you think it’s funny, that’s annoying. Nobody likes annoying DMs, not even your mother.
If a Player personally wants a pregnant character, that’s okay too, but figure out WHY they want that. How does it supports the story and their PC’s growth? And make sure they understand the full implication of having a baby. Which brings us to the next point: what the hell does it even mean for a PC to be pregnant?
If we’re dealing with a standard, non-magical pregnancy, than we’ve got 9 months (or 40 weeks) of in-game time to cover. Getting pregnant obviously requires some sexy-time, and depending on the age of the PC, there’s around a 20 to 15% chance each time they have sex that they’ll get pregant. Another use for percent dice!
The First Trimester
A lot of women don’t even know they’re pregnant for the first 3 weeks, so we can just skip over that. Week 4 is usually when morning sickness starts to kick in, and that can last up to about Week 12 for most people. How you handle morning sickness is up to you, but it can be triggered by eating and smelling gross things. When a PC is puking, they’re pretty much out of commission, and I generally apply a -1 Penalty for Nausea.
By Week 6 the PC is going to be needing more sleep (Fatigue Penalties for another -1). You’re going to be peeing like a maniac (more penalties if you can’t pee when you need to, or just go ahead and wet yourself), and you’re going to start getting emotional. The emotional element is really just a matter of good Roleplaying though.
A Note on Miscarriage: There’s about a 15 to 20% change of Miscarriage within the First Trimester, and even more if your PC is an alcoholic. I roll each Week, and stop rolling for this after Week 12. Remember, strenuous exercise and heavy lifting isn’t good for pregnant women, so it’s not really compatible with the Adventurer lifestyle. This will definitely increase chances of Miscarriage as will direct blows to her uterus.
The Second Trimester
This is Week 12 to 27. The Second Trimester is often cited as being the easier part of pregnancy. The PC is still going to be more emotional and tired, and in addition they’ll probably be super gassy, so that’s always fun for Roleplaying, especially if they’re trying to impress Nobles and Lords. This is also the stereotypical time for cravings to begin.
Week 15 is when they’ll start to appear visibly pregnant, and a lot of women will start to experience back pain by Week 18. Again, I just apply penalties. Most women will also have gained a 15 pounds by now, which if you track Weight Capacity and Encumberance, make a note of it. If you don’t, just apply a Dexterity and Movement penalties.
The Third Trimester
This is Week 28 to 40. Most women will gain up to another 20 pounds in the Third Trimester, so be sure to track this and penalize appropriately. Aches and pains are going to be increasing and more regular (-1 Penatly). A lot of Women will also experience shortness of breath here, so there’s not a lot of hope in fleeing from Orcs and Owl Bears. Penalties, penalties and more penalties!
At Week 32 I start rolling Percent dice for chances of premature birth. I start at 10% and increase it by 10% each week to 100% at Week 41. And in a world without hospitals and advanced medicine most babies would have a difficult time surviving before Week 37.
Not to mention Maternal Mortality in a world without medicine is around 10%, so you’re PC could die, and Infant Mortality might have been as high as 50% in the Ancient World. I roll this each Month for the baby and reduce it by 10% until it hits 0.
Birth!
So, you made it through pregnancy and now your PC has a baby! Good job, now you have a totally helpless creature to protect, feed constantly, clean up after, and keep all of your travelling companions awake all night with. You jackass.
How do I kick out players no one else wants in the game? There’s one girl in my game and her character is an attention hog, and the rest of the girls in the group are getting tired of it. I agree with them, but I don’t know the best way to go about it. She’s my friend.
Your problem is a somewhat common one. Although Roleplayers are pretty damn awesome, we’re not so awesome as to be immune to the assery and general crappiness that plagues humanity. In your games, as in life, you will come across people that irk you slightly, and other people that you just want to punch in the mouth every time they try to open it.
As with any functional group or team activity, you need to have ground rules. These should be ideally decided upon by the group and be know to all (I’ve compared D&D to Social Anarchy in the past, so check it out if you’re interested in a more detailed discussion of game table governance). If you have not yet laid out your game table rules, it’s something you need to get on right away.
As for dealing with the problem Player, if you have any hope of enjoying the game, you need to address the problem quickly and directly. You’ve essentially got three different ways to deal with the problem.
1. The Fuck You Approach
This is pretty simple and straight forward. You just kick them out, and tell them they were ruining everyone else’s enjoyment of the game. I generally avoid doing this until I’ve tried at least one other solution, otherwise you just seem like a bad friend and an incompetent DM. After all, only shitty bosses fire employees without a warning, and the DM is the boss (regardless of what Tony Danza thinks). And as with any good breakup, if you can’t do it to their face, you shouldn’t be doing it at all.
2. The Sniveling Weasel Approach
This involves making the Player’s life a living Hell until they leave. This is reserved for anyone who despises confrontation and doesn’t know how to deal with problems. It’s the perfect way to continue avoiding problems in your life and hoping they go away.
Try removing their PC’s eyes, taking away levels, penalizing experience, having them contract genital herpes – whatever you need to do to make sure they hate the game, and you don’t have to ever address the real problem.
3. The Direct Approach
This is of course the only real solution to the problem, or, at the very least, where you need to start from. I know it’s not easy telling a friend to grow up and stop being a pain in the ass, but one of the roles of the DM is to make sure all of the Players are enjoying the game. If you can’t take charge of your table, than DMing might not be for you.
To begin with: Take her aside, talk to her alone, and do it face-to-face! No one likes being called out on shit in front of other people. It makes them uncomfortable, and it makes them defensive. And I know we live in the world texting and chatting and science, but we’re still human beings, and it’s really hard for us to interpret emotions unless we’re face-to-face, regardless of how many emoticons we might employ.
If she’s a good friend, hopefully you have an open and honest relationship with her. Tell her that she’s being ta loud-mouthed ninny-muggin and trampling over the other players. If you’re not comfortable being straight forward, try saying something along the lines of:
I really appreciate your enthusiasm for the game, but some of the other players are quieter and shier than you, and they have trouble speaking up around you sometimes. It would help me a lot if you would be more aware of them when they get quiet and give them a chance to join in the game.Or, if she’s someone that really needs her ego stroked:
I’ve noticed that you get very involved in roleplaying your character, and it seems like you’re really invested in the story. Some of the other players seem to be having a harder time with it. Do you think you could help me get them more involved?
Those are just a couple of examples, but the main point here is utilize the Player and their loud-mouthed nature to help you out. Tell them what they’re good at, what you appreciate about them, and why the other Players need her help. If you can get her to fix the problem on her own, you’ve sidestepped unnecessary drama, and perhaps even the complete ruination of a friendship.
Once you can manipulate your Players to suit your needs you will be on the path towards true mastery of the Dungeon.
Good luck! And roll it like you mean it!
Don’t forget to check out my RPG Web Series, One Die Short!
This week our question comes to us from across the Narrow Sea:
What is the best way to teach D&D to someone who has never heard of it? I live in Dominican Republic and these kind of games are unspoken so i’m trying to spread the word between friends but it’s a bit hard not knowing “all” the rules myself. Any tips?
Although D&D and Roleplaying games might not be truly “popular” here in the States, I do sometimes forget how fortunate I am to be living in the place where Roleplaying was invented. Even people that have never played an RPG have heard of Dungeons & Dragons. It’s tough to find someone that would have absolutely no clue what you’re talking about, even if a lot of them think all Roleplaying is LARPing or has something to do with Bondage.
That being said, I’ve always derived some sort of perverse pleasure from converting the virginal Roleplayer to my way of life. And I mean that figuratively. Not like… stalking virgin D&D players (Which is all of them! Am I right!? <—-sarcasm, by the way).
What I do mean is that my favorite Roleplayers are the ones that have never played before. The vast majority of people I have rolled with over the years have actually been first-time Players.
Here’s a blog I wrote some time back where I discuss in-depth some tactics for acquiring these types of people and how to get them on board the Roleplaying train. I won’t rehash all of that here, as I want to focus on the “teaching” aspect, but the blog is definitely worth checking out as a newbie.
As with anything new, start out simple. Roleplaying, at its core, is collaborative storytelling. It’s a bunch of people sitting around a table actively participating in the creation of a story together. Start there.
When explaining D&D to new people, I always describe it as a choose-your-own adventure board game without a board. I tell them it’s 1 part acting, 1 part storytelling and 1 part board game. I tell them it’s super fantastically fun, and not at all as weird or confusing as it first sounds.
If you have no experience DMing, don’t try to do everything on your own. Start with a pre-written adventure. Read it over, and then read it again at least five more times. You can findfree adventure modulesall over the internet for 3.5 and 4.0. I would recommend going back even further than 3.5 if you can, not because I necessarily think AD&D was a superior system (though clearly, it was), but because I think it’s focus on Roleplaying and fudging the rules makes it faster and easier for new Players and DMs to pick up.
You can find free online rules compendiums forAD&D and 3.5 pretty easily, so my first piece of advice would be to study whatever system you want to use thoroughly! I know it seems daunting. I know it’s a lot of information, but if you know the basic rules and have a story it’s going to be MUCH easier to get people on board and explain the game.
Now, when I say basic rules I mean BASIC. Focus on learning how to create a character, what a skill check is, and how to fight. And don’t worry about complex combat rules. All you need to start is Roll-to-Hit and Roll-for-Damage. That’s it. Build up from there.
Now that you know the basics really well, don’t worry about them too much. You don’t want to overwhelm new Players with tons of rules, but YOU want to know them, because it will make the game move faster, which makes it more interesting.
I know this hasn’t been the most specific post (i.e. Step 1, Step 2, Step 3, Roleplaying!). I’ve really just give you a lot of homework to do, but trust me, it will be worth it. And if you want a really long, more specific blog, here’s a 3 parter I wrote: Passing on the Craft.
You and your friends are about to start on an fantastical, epic journey of awesomeness, that you will not soon forget. The more you prepare for it, the more fun it will be, and less likely anyone will be to want to stop.
Good luck! And roll it like you mean it!
Don’t forget to check out my RPG Web Series, One Die Short!
Today we take a look at something that the vast majority of humanity struggles with: getting motivated! Our reader writes:
Hey DM,
I’ve been having some issues lately. I am creatively dead at the moment. I’m trying to get two separate D&D games going, neither of which seem like they’ll happen. I haven’t done any updates on my blog in a long while. I don’t have the time or (creative) energy to make anything. Or maybe I’m just lazy. I dunno. Thoughts?
As always I have numerous thoughts, none of which involve telling you what a lazy waste of space you are, or listing all of the reasons you won’t succeed because you’re not following the 7 rules that someone came up with to prove that they’re more successful than you. Fuck self-help advice.
And now I will offer you some.
Getting Motivated!
Motivation is hard. We’ve all been there: some great inspiring idea punches us in our face while we’re sitting in the car, cursing the inability of EVERYONE ELSE on the road to be as good a driver as we are. We fidget impatiently, dreaming of the awesomeness we just thought up, until we finally get home, rush through the door, scatter our belongings across the floor like the bodies of our fallen enemies and then… mmm… potatoes. Or puppies. Whatever. Distractions though.
Lots of them.
Everywhere.
Always.
Why Are You So Distracted?
Are you distracted because you’re lazy? Are you distracted because secretly you know your idea sucks? Do your goals just seem unrealistic and unattainable? Maybe you believe all of those things, or maybe you just have too many shiny objects in your house. Either way, it doesn’t matter.
I am lazy. I have unrealistic goals. And I think most every idea I come up with is lame. But I still do things. Because I am motivated.
This is not the part of my blog where I unveil the deep secrets of the Universe. I have a very simple answer. I am motivated because I found passion. I think that’s what asshats don’t understand that write articles like “500 Reasons You’re a Loser and Won’t Succeed at Life”.
A lack of success isn’t a result of bad networking, or not eating enough oatmeal, or waking up too late, or failing to chanting mantras in the mirror each morning about how clever you are. You just haven’t found your passion.
Where is Your Passion?
“Mr. The DM!” you cry out in anger, “I have found my passion, you asshole!”
If that’s true, than here’s another possibility for you: you have surrounded yourself with so much energy sucking people and situations that you are left with no energy for yourself. Energy is finite. We understand this because we have science. Strategies for motivation and success are NOT science, but energy is. Thermodynamics. Scienced!
It doesn’t matter how motivated you are if you spend all of your energy on other things and other people. The only way you’ll get anywhere is if you cut it all loose. Make passion a priority! Passion is like liquid Gamma Rays injected straight into your brain. But in a good way, like in the Incredible Hulk.
You also might THINK you’ve found your passion. You might love to write, or paint. You might think film or writing code is the greatest thing ever. But why? Is it because you’ve found your deepest passion, or is it because you’re sure you’ve found a way to achieve immortal fame, or a shortcut to becoming a millionaire?
Then your TRUE passion is fame and fortune, so don’t confuse it with acting or the stock market. Recognize your passion for what it is and use that to your advantage. Hone in on your ACTUAL target. Lying to yourself will get you precisely nothing. Passion flows from self honesty, and passion births success. But what the hell is success!?
Success is…
I don’t fucking know!
Don’t ask anyone that question. Success is individual. Success can be making a billion dollars, or 7 babies. Success can be writing 1,000 books that no one ever reads, or becoming the CEO of the next great tech company. For most people success is about leaving a lasting impact. It’s about being remembered. Whether it’s being remembered for swinging naked on a wrecking ball or winning the Nobel Peace Prize, it’s all the same.
We’re terrified of dying, fading away into oblivion, and being forgotten. So find your success wherever it is, and DON’T LET OTHER PEOPLE DEFINE IT FOR YOU.
Success can be friendship, family, love, birth, dogs, cooking, gardens, penguins, money, pie, video games, or beer. But you’ll never find it if you’ve already convinced yourself someone else knows what it is. Because guess what? You ARE a beautiful and unique snowflake. (FUCK YOU TYLER DURDEN!)
And fuck success.
If there’s one thing I’d like for you to take away from all of this rambling, it’s to stop reading other people’s advice on how to be successful and motivated. Because in the end, only you know what you want, what you need, and what you’re lacking. Only you can be honest with yourself. You just have to decide to shut up and listen to yourself. So fuck this blog, because in the immortal words of Socrates: “Nobody knows shit.” Socratized!
Ask the Dungeon Master 